Pairings: The Beauty, The Horror by Tasha Jefferson

Tasha JeffersonBlog Series Vol. 2, Tasha Jefferson


Pairings: the Beauty, the Horror

By Tasha M. Jefferson, MAFM, MBA, BSBA

I am fortunate to live in the city of Columbus, Ohio, a town that offers many free cultural events to the people. Recently, my young daughter and I attended an outdoor Ballet Met performance. It was a nice change of pace and it was nice to see such a mixed crowd. Upon leaving the event, an older Caucasian gentlemen and his wife even watched over me and my daughter to assure that we got out of the garage safely. That simple display of community and concern was very touching, especially in today’s society where people are often disconnected.

During the performance I was struck by how the visual imagery changed when the female and male dancers began to move together. The female and male dancers had danced individually in the scene and those visuals were beautiful. Yet, when they paired together, she was able to leverage her partner to achieve greater elongations, deeper swan dives, fuller back bends, and more sustained rotations. It was simply exquisite and a beautiful sight to witness. The partnership facilitated that when joined, the individuals could achieve extraordinary positions and outcomes that they could not have physically achieved alone.

Relationships can exponentially increase our individual abilities; within good relationships we can become more, better, incredible. Unfortunately, that power works both ways. Poor relationships can figuratively make people: stretch to the point of snapping; plummet into deep, dark depths of despair; bend so far that they break; or go round and round in circles, wasting energy and exacerbating frustrations. The ballet scene would have been horrifying to witness if those same movements were based in malice and violence. Even more, real pairings that engage one another with negativity and physical violence are an utmost threat and are truly repulsive.

If you are or someone that you know is in an abusive relationship, I personally implore you to seek help from a friend, family member, or local agency. Unhealthy pairings are not normal and should be avoided. Maybe you are so deep into your abusive situation that you cannot leave, and you cannot explain to yourself or to anyone else why you stay. I repeat, abuse is not normal and you should seek to get out from it. Make a plan and see it through. One day you too can have a normal, exquisitely beautiful situation. You deserve that and you are worthy of it.

I almost did not write this article, but after writing it I began to realize that we have to talk about the hard topics. It does our fellow man no good to suffer alone in silence. Real people are dealing with real issues such as abuse, molestation, addiction, depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts. To save a life, it may just take someone writing an article, or starting a discussion on social media, or asking a friend how they are really, really doing. No matter how, let’s talk about it, let’s save lives.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline number is 1-800-273-8255.

Thank you for reading this article and I personally hope that you have a great day. To read more of my articles, please visit